So I’m sitting on my couch, sipping wine and watching the Breakfast Club. It has been such a great remedy after the day I’ve had. The jock character, played by Emilio Estevez, reminds me so much of a dear friend of mine that passed away March 2012 from a rare blood disease, HLH. My friend Miller was a jock, had a huge heart and thrived on being there for others in need. I have been thinking about him so much lately. I miss him.
Things seem to be looking up for me as of recent in all aspects of life. My 7 month old son is doing so wonderful and he continues to make me smile more and more everyday. He is striving so much! He crawls, can stand up, climbs and he has 2 teeth now. I love him so much and it is a pleasure to watch him grow.
On the husband front, things seem to be getting a little better. I confronted him about everything I found on his computer and still holding on to that nurse’s phone number from one of the hospitals he frequents while at work. I honestly don’t know what the deal is with him and the pretty little nurse, but from what he says there is nothing going on. I’m not sure if I believe him or not because he has spent many years lying to me. We left our son with my parents yesterday, while him and I went to a movie and went out to dinner for our 2 year wedding anniversary, which is this Tuesday. My parents gave us money which was so sweet because they knew we couldn’t afford it on our own. I have to say it was nice, but it just felt so awkward. My husband and I didn’t seem to click like we used to, but I think it’s due to all of the heartache that has gone on. I tried to be relaxed with him, but I just found it to be very difficult on my end. We didn’t really hold hands like we used to when we’d go out, but he did look at my cleavage which is very typical since boobs are his thing. Typical guy I guess…haha! I will just continue to try to have faith in him and hope that we are able to reconnect at some point.
So after some pushing from my best gal pal, I applied for unemployment this past week. I didn’t think I would qualify, so that is why I didn’t bothering trying after I left my job in December. It turns out, that it is looking really good for me getting approved. This will help us financially so very much!!! I hope it works out because I need some kind of peace of mind in my life right now.
I don’t talk about this much, but I am really into baking. I used to bake such awesome confections and at one point I was selling them. I made a very good amount during the holidays many years back. I have a close friend that owns an event planning/baking company. She has asked me to help her with her son’s 1st birthday event and said it will give me a chance to show her what I can do with the possibility of becoming her assistant in the future. I am so excited about this possible opportunity…it has been a dream for me. The best part, I can take my son to work with me! I am keeping fingers crossed this happens for me.
Well, that is it from me for now. Just have to keep holding on tight and try to keep a positive attitude. :-)
I really like this. It motivates me to perfect my baking abilities, especially trying my hand at gluten free baking.
So hard, but trying!
Don’t allow the negative things in your life to discount the positive ones. Don’t let a bad day or month or year make you feel like you have a bad life. Instead of focusing on everything that’s going wrong, start holding onto all of the things that are going right. You may be struggling, but there is still so much to keep fighting for — there is still so much more to life than this pain. And if you keep picking yourself back up and pushing forward, no matter how difficult things are, you will discover it. Maybe not tomorrow or next week or a year from now, but someday soon, things will get better. Someday soon, you will find freedom from this darkness. And when you do, you’ll look back on these days and wonder how you could have doubted your resilience. You’ll look back and marvel at how something as small as refusing to give up could transform your life in such a substantial way.
Good things are coming…I can feel it!
This is so beautiful…I want to find this place even if it’s only in my dreams.
I want to go there someday…
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